Should A Christian Use Sex Toys?

[dropcap]M[/dropcap]rs. Happy is asked this question often. She is amazed, in fact, by how regularly it’s posed by believers. Then she noticed on a recent cross-country road trip the proliferation of “adult toy” stores set in tidy buildings at seemingly random places along the interstate. (Well, not exactly random. They are in remote places, no doubt ducking municipal zoning laws. See? Even the heathens know better than to invite it in their town.) And then she remembered all of the ridiculous “lingerie” and “marital enhancement” parties that have invaded Middle America. Sex toys are everywhere; someone in China, no doubt, is making a fortune off of it. (And mocking us all the while.)

Beloved, are we bored with sex? It sure seems that way. It doesn’t take all that to make sex enjoyable and fulfilling. Our incredible Creator, in fact, gave us everything we need to please our spouse for a lifetime. Your body is fearfully and wonderfully made–and brilliantly and uniquely suited among all creation for repeated and regular sexual pleasure.

You’ve probably already deduced that Mrs. Happy’s satisfied countenance frowns at the use of sex toys. Here’s why, in simple bullet points for all of you linear-thinking types:

1. Where did those things come from? Do you really know? Did you buy it in some roadside sex shop stacked with pornography and swirling with foul spirits? OK, now let me be blunt. Demonic spirits really can be attached to these things. Do you want to stick that into your most intimate bodily space?
2. The sex toys for women tend to be manufactured in pornographic proportions. If you get accustomed to using them for sexual gratification, you might find yourself unable to reach climax with your mere-mortal husband.
3. The use of sex toys takes our focus off of each other and onto an object.
4. Asking the question “Are sex toys permissible?” is the wrong approach to start with. Sex is all about celebrating the most intimate human connection—marriage. We should be asking instead: Does this add or detract from intimacy? Does this honor the amazing, holy, God-ordained gift of sex between a husband and wife?
5. Don’t be a lazy lover. Sex toys are unnecessary; God gave you hands, etc., to bring pleasure to your mate if you don’t get the satisfaction you want from intercourse. Learn how to please your spouse—it does take an investment of time and conversation—and you won’t have to resort to gimmicks.
6. Many might be familiar with Hebrews 13:4, which says that “Marriage must be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept undefiled.” Some have mistaken this to mean that anything done between consenting spouses in the marriage bed is, by definition, undefiled, but Mrs. Happy begs to differ. She does not concur with the “anything goes” philosophy. The original Greek in this passage makes clear that there is an imperative—meaning an active responsibility—on the believer’s part to preserve purity in the bedroom. We must take measures to keep our married sex lives undefiled. Bringing in a sex toy, which mimics and substitutes for something God created, presents a great risk of defilement. It is not a risk worth taking, in Mrs. Happy’s humble opinion.

Can Mrs. Happy conclusively prove from the Scriptures that sex toys are bad, bad, all bad? Nope. But again, if you’re asking what you can get away with and not get burned, you’re asking the wrong question.

Mrs. Happy has been married to one man for a long time. She is happy to read and sometimes respond to your comments and questions at www.mannaexpressonline.com.